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The games are upon us, flying the flags of the world: Switzerland, Luxombourg, Bermuda and the Cayman Islands.
With the endurance of a marathon runner, and the contortions of a gymnast, Mitt Romney is at the top of his game.
Multi-million medalist Romney goes for the gold in the four-hundred kilometer offshore event,
And is the leading contender to win the Freestyle Evasion at the twenty-twelve games.
With advantages that surpass any competitor, or otherwise mortal human, Mitt has what it takes to dominate the Tax Avoidance Decathalon,
And is expected to keep bringing home the gold for years to come.
He's led the team to victory as captain, owner, CEO and managing director.
For this is not child's play, it is the ultimate sport.
Because Mitt knows only a strong, driven businessman can excel at the presidency.
Bain Capital is proud to sponsor the twenty-twelve Mitt-lympics.
Join us in cheering our preferred competitor with every advantage.
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